I am one of a Sacred Lodge of Women Shamans, Chiefs, Priestesses, and Healers. Each New Moon we gather virtually for two days of ceremony, led by Lodge Sister Karen Chrappa of A Structure for Spirit. This New Moon the Despacho ceremony honors the Sacred Union of the Masculine and Feminine within us. You are invited to participate in the ceremony in progress now. Please visit Sacred Union Despacho to join the ceremony.
Are You Lovable?
Romantic love, like all love, is born of a Desire for Spirit.
When two humans fall in love, they are enacting the first Love Story, the one that began Time itself. It is the story of the Divine Oneness of Spirit intentionally, playfully, separating itself into TWO, masculine and feminine, so that It may enjoy the BLISS of coming together in sexual union--the return to Oneness.
In Ancient India, the masculine was called Shiva and the feminine Shakti. Their o.rgasmic union of Love is Ananda--Bliss--one of the attributes of God, who is Eternal Bliss Consciousness. The deliberate play of separating and reunited of Shiva and Shakti through the ages of time is what continually creates the world and sustains life. Is it any wonder that the path of Orgasmic Bliss Union is way new humans come into the world?
This may seem too much to ask of mere mortals, who simply want to love and be loved in return. The grandeur, majesty, and mystery of Divine Union is pretty high expectation for a first date, or even a marriage.
Or is it?
We look to romance, love, and sex to fill an emptiness, to complete our incompletion. We look to another person to prove to us we are lovable. Our natural yearning for Love is tainted with fear and anxiety that we are not attractive, lovable, and will never find love. This anxiety is mirrored back by finding fault with others as not quite right for us, or unworthy of our love.
And that, my Valentine, is the real burden of expectation --and fear-- that will break Love’s back every time.
The secret to being attractive is ancient, simple, and for many of us, deeply challenging:
To Love, Be Lovable.
Deepak Chopra writes on romance in his book The Path to Love.
“Can we find another way to approach Romance … without listening to the fearful voice inside ourselves that finds a way to keep love at a distance? We can’t keep confinin
g romance to an emotional state; we must redefine it as a surrender to the mystery of our own spirit, for beneath the turbulence of emotion that is what romance is. It is the state in which your primary relationship is not with your beloved but with your Self. Romance begins when you can show your soul to another person.”
Being lovable is not a superficial quality of physical attractiveness or behavior. Being Lovable is a quality of Spirit, which fills us and belongs to us naturally. Spirit is the truth of who we are. If we can see that, Chopra reminds us, the anxious searching for love can cease. Your own Being, because it is never lost, does not need to be found.
Those who cannot find love do not see themselves as being lovable.
What creates romance is the ability to see yourself as lovable.
This shift in perception happens not by changing who you are, but by seeing who you are and then shining it forth. If you were able to exhibit the full grandeur of your being, your whole life would be a romance, one long love story dedicated to ecstacy and joy.
Valentine, you are already all the Love you want. You are having a delicious romance with Self, your inner infinite Being. When you choose to come together with another Self, you are two Spirits who pretend to be separate for the sheer joy of coming together in Love. You are God expressing love for God.
You couldn't be more Lovable!
