This is my story:
MY DIVINE CALLING
People ask me how I became a sexual healer. I answer simply, my own healing brought me here. I know what it’s like to feel like there is something wrong with me, and that I do not deserve any better. I once stood where you stand, filled with disatisfaction, frustration, despair.
I was raised in a Southern Baptist church where the extent of sex education was that I was to save myself for marriage to one man and have children. Detailed information about what I was saving for my husband: my body, sexuality, pleasure, even reproduction was not included. I went to college in the era of Women’s Liberation and sexual freedom of the early 70s. Suddenly there was lots of information and lots of permission or an obligation to explore sexually. How confusing! Shame and secrecy does not meet free love gracefully. I retreated into what I knew about sex and love, and in my early 20s I got married and had children (being a rebel at heart, I had the children first and then got married).
I married a sexy man, older than I was, who had filmed the revolution of the Sixties. While I was hearing preachers condemn Free Love and Antiwar protesters to Hellfire, he was out living Free Love and activism in the streets and communes. Of course, I found him irresistable. Early in our relationship, it became clear I had a problem. While I was multi-orgasmic, deeply and powerfully so, I only had orgasms with my clitoris, not with intercourse. My husband and I agreed there was something wrong with me, and that was OK. I accepted the situation because, well, there was clearly something wrong with me.
During all this time, culture and media were flooded with information about sex, mostly distorted. The bottom line is that a glut of information, a so-called open permissive society, and sexual experience do not heal shame. If anything it drove it deeper inside me. And I had no one to talk to. I was so ashamed of myself and my inadequacy. I’d never speak to a therapist or doctor, or reveal my problem to a girlfriend.
After many years of believing something was wrong with me at the core of my being, I became desperate. and depressed. I longed for shared intimacy with my husband, and I wanted him to give me what I was missing, namely that connection with myself and God that would make me feel whole. Isn’t that what I had learned in church, that my sexuality belongs to my husband and he was responsible to fix me if I was broken? So things got worse. I blamed him for what was wrong with me and with us, and soon, there was something wrong with him! It was awful. My marriage fell apart.
I literally went on a vision quest. I had to heal this pain and shame inside me. I had to take responsibility for myself. Intuitively I felt that sex was a sacred union between two people, a profound experience of intimacy, connection, to one another and divine. I had always felt that in my body as a child, even though I didn’t have words for it. Life taught me this through nature, because it is true. It’s how we are made. The church had to work very hard to educate this truth out of my inner knowing and experience.
On my quest of many years, I awakened and nurtured the divine longing within me. I embodied my desire in art. I met healers who taught me about energy. I found earth based spiritual ceremony: sweat lodge and dance that brought me into a physical union with Divine. I had a lover who demonstrated with me that there was nothing wrong with me that touch wouldn’t heal.
Then I found an Initiation into Divine Love and sacred sexuality. I rediscovered the truth about sexuality. It’s not about reproduction or sexual behavior. Sexuality is a human being’s core relationship with Self and all of Life. Orgasmic energy is our avenue of communication with everything. All Love is grounded in Self-Love. We must feel Self-Love in order to enjoy relationship, especially physical sexual relationship, with another person. That as spiritual beings we come to life to have a sensual experience. This is our divine calling : We shall connect with life sexually, intimately, in a fully-embodied, physically pleasurable way. That far from there being anything wrong with me, I was so deeply right from the very beginning.
I had found my own healing path that prepared me to be the healer and guide that I am for you. I liberated my voice to speak out loud about sexuality, about orgasm, to teach, to create, and to touch. No one should suffer in shame and silence as I have. My journey began with birth into a culture that was silent and deadly regarding sexuality. Somehow this was exactly perfect and necessary for me. It has brought me here to a time and place where I can help others heal their sexual shame, feel the fullness of pleasure, and change the legacy of sexual repression for our children.
with Love,
Diva Carla
Here is my formal bio:
Reverend Diva Carla was born to draw the body. Her art expresses the form, volume, space, and sensuality of the body. More than that, her art reveals Divinity embodied. Diva Carla believes that God’s love for us is erotic, and that mutual desire, that divine longing for union, is evident in her work. She makes sensual art with magical powers. Her work includes sculpture, drawing, and painting, with erotic and shamanic themes reflective of her spiritual life. People buy her work to use as personal talismans, amulets, and ritual bowls to enhance their healing and manifesting process.
In her healing work as an orgasmic alchemy healer, Diva Carla serves people who are committed to Reclaiming their True Power. She works with people through powerful immersion programs of one day to 6 months duration. Her programs are focused on sexuality, wealth consciousness, and money for individuals, couples, and small groups. Diva Carla believes that sexual expression is a Divine Right of human beings, essential to freedom, empowerment, healing, and relationship to God. Teaching adults about their orgasmic energy frees them to be creative, whole human beings bringing the fullness of their gifts and talents to life.
Diva Carla is the Keeper of Hope Peace Chamber, a sacred space for Sound healing. The chamber is located on land at Hope Peace Ceremonies, whose mission is to spiritually support and nourish the visionaries, activists, leaders and healers who are creating the new paradigm of peaceful community on earth, through ceremony, permaculture, art, abundance, and orgasmic energy.
I firmly believe in the power of healing and the Life we can create together as people, when we unconditionally love the ones we are with, when we see and touch each other.
