Last night I felt lonely.
Enchanted by first fireflies of the season I was suddenly swamped by loneliness. For years, I sat alone on summer nights watching the fireflies in their twinkly mating light show, feeling desperately lonely for a beloved, someone to see into me, my heart, my Soul.
Last night I felt sorry for myself, just for a little while. Then I realized these feelings are a memory, a bit of nostalgia. My sweetheart was out of town last night, and he will be back tonight. We'll watch fireflies together. I went to bed, no longer lonely.
This morning in my meditations, I pondered the bittersweet emotions of loneliness. So often, loneliness is paired with feelings about love. You may be longing for your soulmate, like I was. Or you may be with your soulmate, but you are going through a rough patch. The loneliest I ever felt in my life was when my marriage was on the skids. Every night I lay in bed beside my husband, the emotional distance so great I feared if I reached out I would feel an empty bed. It was scary.
Turned inward, loneliness can feel crushing, even though relief may be just a phone call away. Your friend's number is on speed dial, but you avoid making the call. What you really want is for them to call YOU, because what if no one answers, or they have plans, or – and you are making this one up – you are bothering them.
Loneliness does a number on your self-esteem. Your life starts looking like a depressing pity-party with a guest list of one – you! And maybe your cat or your parakeet.
I know those feelings too well. I also know the distraction tricks like Netflix, food, Jane Austen novels (my drug of choice), working 14 hours a day (my other drug), even happy hour. At least there were people at happy hour.
Underneath that bittersweet feeling is your desire for love, touch, and connection, often projected onto your desire for a partner. Loneliness becomes the exquisite heartache of not having what you want, and the weariness of waiting for it. If your longing is tied up in the past with a lost love, or a love that done you wrong, like in a country-western song, then you have a problem. Your unconscious mind still has someone to love, and there is no room for the one who really wants to be with you to get in!
What if you see loneliness as Divine Longing – the call of your heart for the one you love to be with you now.
What you seek is seeking you!
Yes, someone really wants to love you. Your soulmate is right here, maybe sharing a bed with you now, and you are not really available. Your open sign isn't lit up, and the welcome mat isn't out, even if you think it is. (I learned about this the hard way myself – one heartbreak after another.)
Reframe loneliness into Divine Longing, and then focus on the Divine part. You see, Divine wants you to have what you want even more than you do. You are the only one in the way.
Divine is not restricted by time.
Divine doesn't make excuses.
Divine has no limiting beliefs.
Divine doesn't believe you are unworthy, unattractive, or unlucky -- Divine knows how awesome you are!
And Divine doesn't believe there are no good men out there! Divine knows there are plenty of good men out there. The Divine is a matchmaker and is all about bringing you and your partner together!
Do you want to be with your Soulmate by September, or sooner?
What's in the way of you having the love you want? What needs to be released, shifted, healed? What skills are you missing? What blind spots need to be revealed?
Do you want to be lonely for the next three months or longer? Or worse, make another mistake, cruising for heartbreak, waste more time, and risk confirming all those untrue, unkind things you sometimes think about yourself?
Let's do something about it.
I can help you open your heart, turn the porch light on, and put out the welcome mat for your sweetheart. The benefits are enormous, because what's been keeping love away has been keeping other good things away too.
Ready? Is your heart telling you yes, let's go?
We can get started now, this month, in June.
Here's what you do. Copy and past the following questions into an email (or click reply to this email), answer them in detail, and send to email@example.com.
Here are the questions to email to me:
Full Name, phone number, email address, time zone
What is your Divine Longing for your love life and relationship?
What do you think is stopping you from having that now?
On a scale of 1 – 10, how important is it for you to change this now?
If we are a match to work together, are you ready to commit time, attention, effort, and money turning the lights on in your love life now?
When I receive your email I will send you my calendar link to schedule a chat with me to see if we are a match to work together.
Get ready to rock your world. You don't have to watch the fireflies or the fireworks alone! Your soulmate is waiting for you!